It is with a hole in my heart and a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Chubby Hubby in my hand that I’m writing tonight to tell you Gwyneth and I will be leaving New York City.
Since we shared the news that I got laid off at the end of the Summer, we have done our best to make staying in New York work. But we made a commitment to ourselves that we’d wave the white flag before we’d risk our financial health, and we are out of time. Packing up our apartment, patching the anchors in our walls and painting over our pink door are what’s on this month’s agenda for The New Yorkies. (Oh, the irony.)
I wish I could tell you that I’m at peace with the decision to move back home to North Carolina, but I’d be lying. While there is so much I am thankful for, I can’t stop worrying – this morning I actually broke out in hives. What are people going to think when they hear that at 32 years old, I had to move back in with my parents? Will they think I’m the loser that I feel like? What if my building won’t let me get out of my lease? How am I going to keep it together when it’s time to paint back the door? Do I have to change the name of the blog now? Why am I worrying about all of this instead of being grateful that my parents are able and more than willing to take me and Gwyneth in? These are the questions playing on repeat in my head.
I don’t know the answer to any of them, but I do know this – Gwyneth and I started this blog because we lived in New York City and didn’t want to be here. We set out on mission to make New York City feel like home, and we did it. I am prouder of accomplishing that goal than any other. More importantly, the days spent getting there were the happiest I’ve known – so far.
So here we go. Round 2. And this time around we don’t just have some experience under our belt; we’re surrounded by the people who love us the most. In fact, they’re right down the hall.
mk & Gwyneth